Actual Things I Said

I've posted before about saying things I never thought I would say in a classroom, but it happens so often that I'm thinking I should probably turn it into a series, so I present to you

Actual Things That I Said In My Classroom This Week

"Please don't wear nylons over your face in class."

"Let's not talk about mass murder today."

"No one is allowed to stab anyone else with the compass."

"Can you tell me why you thought having a water fight in class would be a good idea?"

"Don't rub your bloody finger on me ever again please."

"If  you crawl out the window again then I have to mark you truant."