That Time I Went On A Field Trip

I took a bunch of kids to a math competition last week. It was....fun... but mostly now I see why my teachers didn't take me on very many field trips. It was every bit as exhausting as you would guess a 7 hour bus ride with 50 teenagers would be. This field trip was unique though, because instead of being 50 of your average teenagers, these were the top 50 math students in the district. Don't worry, I kept a travel log so that it would be like you, my dear blog readers, were right there with me experiencing this amazingness.

4:45am
Student: OH MY GOSH MS. TEACHER I NEVER DREAMED I WOULD GET TO SEE YOU THIS EARLY IN THE MORNING!!! HAHAHAHAHA YAAAAAY!
Me: 

5:00am
We're supposed to be off but we're missing one student. I'm calling the mom. She says he's coming, please wait.
5:10am
No sign of late student.
5:25am
I'm already hungry. How can I be hungry when I shouldn't even be awake?
5:30am
THE STUDENT IS HERE. Let's go please.
5:35am
The Bust Driver: "Blah blah blah, where are the emergency exits, blah blah blah. PAY ATTENTION: If this bus catches on fire you have exactly 3 minutes until the entire bus is engulfed in flames."
My brain: I wonder if fires grow linearly or exponentially.
5:40am
We're finally off. Good, let's settle into sleepy time.
5:42am
It is becoming increasingly obvious that sleepy time is not going to happen.
5:50am
Male Student to Female Student He Is Flirting With: You've never heard of Tran-Siberian Orchestra?!!!? We have to fix this immediately.
Female Student Who Is Happily Being Flirted With: Do you have headphones?
MSTFSHIFW: No, but that's okay. It won't bother anymore.
Me: *bothered*
6:03am
"This one time when I was in a chess tournament..."
6:22am
Someone literally just sprayed cologne on the bus. No one will fess up, but we are almost literally swimming in Axe.
6:36am
We just stopped at a gas station (one hour into the trip) to let students go to the bathroom. I think also the bus driver needed some air that was not drenched in cologne.
6:55am
Back on the bus.  A thing that I know: the last thing these kids need is candy.
7:08am
Is there like a rule that says bus drivers have to drive under a certain speed limit? Or is this bus driver just trying to kill me with his slow driving?
7:32am
We just had to pull over on the side of the road because someone decided to open the emergency exit window in the top of the bus which made the (very annoying) emergency alarm go off.  "I was getting too warm" they said.
7:54am
Total count of times I've heard "Too bad this isn't a band trip" this morning: 12
8:13am
Stopped at McDonalds for breakfast. I am so sorry McDonalds. You had no idea how badly your morning would suck.
9:03am
Back on the road. We should all be impressed with McDonald's efficiency and their ability to not murder teenagers who want to play on the play place at ungodly hours of the morning.
9:17am
We just went through a tunnel and all hell broke loose. There was literal screaming.
9:19am
I cannot remember a time when I wasn't on this bus.
9:22am
We are so close. I just need to hold on to my sanity for a few more minutes and then I can breath air that hasn't been breathed by kids who probably didn't brush their teeth this morning and definitely didn't shower.
9:29am
The 12th graders are literally reciting the unit circle together. Wut.
9:37am
WE ARE HERE. I never thought this moment would come.

The actual field trip was nice because mostly I just handed off my students and then had a few hours of free time. It was lovely until we lost about 17 students. Why can't they just be at the bus at 1pm like we told them to? Don't worry, we found them eventually. They were rolling down a hill apparently.

The ride home was just as eventful, but I was so exhausted that I couldn't take notes, I just sat in my seat and thought about that lovely nap I was going to take the second I got home instead of grading tests for parent/teacher conferences the next day like I should.  I did take a nap when I got home, and it was lovely, and I regret nothing.