Teenagers Say the Darndest Things (12)

Student: What did your teacher friend get you for Christmas.
Me: She hasn't gotten me anything yet.
Student: Well what did you get her?
Me: A book.
Student: A book?! No wonder she hasn't gotten you anything.

Student: I think if I got a pet goat I would name it Barley.

Student 1: I was in band!
Student 2: No you weren't! What did you play, the triangle?
Student 1: I played the drums!
Student 2: So I was right?

Me: I heard you guys got a hot tub.
Student: Oh yeah!
Me: That's awesome, do you love it?
Student: Well yes, but it's not that great because you get in trouble if you  try to take the dog in it.

Student: *struggling with a ring pop wrapper* I'm not strong enough to open this! *continues struggling then finally accepts defeat* That must be a sign that I've been eating too much candy and I don't deserve this.

Student: "Is it two birds with one stone or two stones with one bird?"

(I had just gotten back from being dunked in a dunk tank. How do I allow myself to get talked into these things? I was looking like a drowned rat when this happened.)
Student: So...did you just run out of hair product today?

Me: Bye guys, have a good night!
Student 1: Thanks, you too!
Student 2: Wait, can teachers have good nights?

Click below for past posts of teenagers saying the darndest things.
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I have a stamp of my own face.

It's the greatest. You get it on your test if you get 100% on the first try. You would be absolutely surprised what kids will do to get a stamp of my face on their test.

The greatest thing about it is that sometimes I get interesting creations drawn with my head. This is the best one yet:

How I feel when there are teachers who have been teaching the same classes for years and it takes them 10 minutes to prep and I am teaching new classes and take hours and hours to prep:

Teenagers Say the Darndest Things (11)

Me: I am going to show you a really cool video I found yesterday.
Student: Are you sure it's actually cool?
Me: Yes, it's totally cool.
Student: But you think math is cool...

Student: If your hair naturally that blonde?
Me: Nope.
Student: Are you--oh! Dang it, I was so excited to ask if you were an albino.

"Would it be okay if I ran to my first period really quick? I left my pet lizard in my desk on accident."

Me: *teaching* We can't combine those x's yet because they are inside the parenthesis. Remember they are in parenthesis prison until we do what the parentheses are asking us to do.
Student: I feel like I'm in parenthesis prison.

Click below for past posts of teenagers saying the darndest things.
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That Time When My Student Was a Human Fan

Schools are always unbearably hot. I am telling you that it is 12 degrees outside right now, and I am wearing a tshirt and flats because I get way too hot if I wear anything else. I don't understand it. Aren't we trying to save money? Can't we start by just turning down the heater a bit?

Anyway, one day my students and I were all sweating to death while we were trying to do math. It was bad. No one could focus and we all shed as much clothing as you can in a public school.  In a moment of desperation one of my students decided to make the ultimate sacrifice and become a human fan for us. She tied her jacket around her waist and held it out like a cape and then ran, full speed, around the room. It worked! Her gust of air as she went running past felt just like a nice cool breeze blowing by, and we all cooled down. She nearly died, but at least we got a moment of relief and also some laughs.

Why I write postcards to all of my students

For the past couple of years I have written every student a post card and given it to them on their last day of class with me. I think it's a nice gesture because I genuinely feel like I have real love for every single student, and I want them to know that I feel that way, Also, I have noticed that when I know I am going to writing post cards to students I treat my students a bit differently. I make an effort talk to every single student and get to know them on a personal level, instead of just the rowdy or outgoing students.  I keep notes about the things that I talk to them about so that I can remember to ask them about it again later and remember to write it in their post card. I truly believe it helps me and them connect better. I also truly believe that you can get anyone to do anything (including miserable math) if they know that you truly care about them.

That Time My Students Complimented Me

Teenagers aren't the best at compliments. They're usually way more prone to pointing out my flaws by asking things like "Why is all of your hair yellow but it's black right on your scalp?"

The other day I wore a new outfit to school and I apparently did something right in those teenagers' minds because I got a compliment! One student said "You look really cute today! I mean you always look cute, but today you're outfit is like an outfit I would actually wear if I  had to."